Last Saturday was October 3rd, one year after we had lost our Mia. Brian and I truly had a peaceful day. It was raining here. Something was actually quite nice about the rain. We wanted to take Jada out to the cemetery and release some pink balloons then go play at the park. Instead, Jada stayed in the car and watched a movie while Brian and I both took umbrellas and stood out by her headstone. As we sloshed through the muddy ground and totally drenched our legs, we cried/no wept as we just stood there for a while. Then Brian read the letter that He wrote to Mia and read at her funeral. It was beautiful. As Brian was reading I was staring at a pink lily that one of our good friends brought by. The lily was magnificent as it held the rain drops on it's petals...almost unwilling to let the water fall off. I was thinking about the rain and what I had recently read about the wonder of rain and how majestic, powerful and miraculous God is in rain...and how He is that way in our lives. He is the Lily of the Valley that sends rain and holds our tears dearly, not willing to let one tear fall without holding it. And He so understands!!! Hebrews 5:7 & 8..."During the days of Jesus' life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission. Although he was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered.."
We were glad to remember Mia and we had to leave her grave b/c I have to go the bathroom so frequently in the pregnancy :) ....which was another reminder of God's kindness towards us!
We were also able to go through Mia's trunk when we got home. As we read through letters and emails, held onto the same blanket that Mia was wrapped in, looked at her sonogram pictures...we ached in the reality of our loss but were once again overwhelmed with how much we were loved and carried through that terribly hard time! Scriptures, songs, poems, thoughts, and personal stories once again touched both Brian and I in ways that we will truly never forget! The body of Christ that loves us is truly Christ's body that gave us comfort this weekend and a year ago.
And Jada and I have been preparing Kiva's room for her! I unpack boxes of baby toys and clothes and Jada plays in them :) It has been fun...and crazy how time flies...wasn't Jada just wearing and using all of these baby things?
I added this pic b/c Jada decided that all of these stuffed animals and babies needed to ride in Kiva's carrier :)
And our sweet Kiva!!! She is getting ready to be here in some serious ways. Some of you commented on how low I am carrying, and yes, I am...she dropped even more about three weeks ago. So, at this weeks' appointment, after the ultrasound and dilation check (so fun :)~) my doc recommended we induce late October!!! What??? You mean less than three weeks away? Yep! I am really wanting to have her naturally (w/o an epidural) but I totally want to induce too...so here we go! I will let you all know the date when we decide for sure...but we are on high speed finishing Kiva's room and the other to-do's that I thought would be nice to have done. However, we are ready for her to be here, in our arms asap...whether or not the cute curtain rod and hooks are bought yet!!!
I think I want to make sure and say something to close: This time last year we were literally being carried by you all, our church family near and far and our family...you grieved with us so well. This year we really want you to know that we celebrate Kiva even more because of the ways you have already celebrated and encouraged us with her life! THANK YOU!